Articles by John Sharry

My 14 yr old struggles with homework and study. She might have ADHD.

Parent QuestionMy daughter is 14 and in second year in secondary school. She is really struggling with study and homework. She could not get it together to study for the Christmas tests and did not do as well as she wanted. This is despite the fact that she is a bright girl and in primary … Continue reading My 14 yr old struggles with homework and study. She might have ADHD.

Should I go for an ADHD assessment as a parent?

Parent QuestionI am a father to a 10-year-old boy who has been recently diagnosed with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). He has been struggling in school since day one, so the diagnosis is not a surprise. We had to get our own private assessment with a psychologist as he has been on the waiting list … Continue reading Should I go for an ADHD assessment as a parent?

Is my 11 year old burnt out from school?

Parent Question:My 11-year-old son is in sixth class and hates going to school. He is always reluctant to go in the morning and there is often tears before I finally persuade him out the door. He is also constantly complains of being tired, especially when he comes in from school and he has to lie … Continue reading Is my 11 year old burnt out from school?

At what age should I give my child a mobile phone?

Question:My daughter was 12 last week and she is already starting to pester me about getting a mobile phone. She sees her older sister on her phone all the time and thinks she deserves one. Also, it seems one of her classmates got one over the summer and this has added to the pressure. Her … Continue reading At what age should I give my child a mobile phone?

My teenager’s friends are a bad influence.

Parent Question: My 14-year-old son has fallen in with a bad group of friends and we are worried. He found the transition to secondary school hard. He was isolated and unhappy in first year and Covid made this harder. It took him a long while to find a group of friends who accepted him. Now … Continue reading My teenager’s friends are a bad influence.

My teenage sons do not get on with each other

Parent Question:My husband and I have two teenage boys in secondary school. They are both very polite and kind young men in general company. They have good circles of friends and their teachers seem to like them. The problem is that they refuse to engage with each other with any civility. The older son hates … Continue reading My teenage sons do not get on with each other

My 12 year old has been dropped by her friends

Parent Question:My 12-year-old daughter used to happily belong to a friendship group of five other girls. Over the past few weeks they seem to have dropped her and it is breaking her heart. There is one girl who sees herself as the “leader” who seems to be behind it. My daughter had some sort of … Continue reading My 12 year old has been dropped by her friends

We are separating, how can we help our children cope?

Parent Question: After a long process, my wife and I have decided to separate. We want to do it right for our two children, aged six and eight, and we are working hard to co-parent well. We are trying to have no conflict or arguments (well as little as possible) in front of the children. … Continue reading We are separating, how can we help our children cope?

Emetophobia: How to help my daughter’s phobia of vomiting?

Parent Question: My daughter has a phobia of being sick. It is totally consuming her and our lives. She is such a loving girl, but this is all we talk about as she needs constant reassurance she won’t vomit. Please help. Answer: A fear of getting sick or vomiting, also known as emetophobia, is much … Continue reading Emetophobia: How to help my daughter’s phobia of vomiting?

My son says he hates himself

Parent Question: My little boy, who is six, is an only child. He is very lovable, kind, intelligent, strong-willed, but he tends to lack self-esteem. He tends to self-loathe and often says he hates himself. He doesn’t accept praise without putting his negativity on it. He gets so easily defeated too and says he feels … Continue reading My son says he hates himself

My 5 year old is soiling his pants.

Parent Question: My (almost) five-year-old is very capable and bright. But for 18 months now he frequently finishes the day with a smear of poo in his pants or having wee’d himself. He doesn’t say anything to anyone. And even when he gets that “faraway” look in his eyes that means he is soiling himself. … Continue reading My 5 year old is soiling his pants.

Is my quiet 10 year old girl autistic?

Parent Question:Though she can be chatty with us at home, my 10-year-old daughter has always been very quiet when she is out socially and when she is in school. When she was a preschooler she was diagnosed as selectively mute and we took her to see a speech therapist and a play therapist, both of … Continue reading Is my quiet 10 year old girl autistic?

My son won’t follow rules

Parent Question:My seven-year-old son is very defiant. It is particularly problematic in extracurricular activities. Initially, I thought it was related to physical activities only, which would be understandable as he has a mild physical disability which results in fatigue. However, he is also defiant with his music teacher and won’t follow the basic rules of … Continue reading My son won’t follow rules

My 3 year old is always hitting his brother

Parent Question:My 3½-year-old son is constantly using force or hitting his 1½-year-old brother. Sometimes, I manage to catch before he does it and I am able to stop him. Other times, I turn around and he has just hit him and his brother is screaming. I give out to him and that does not work, … Continue reading My 3 year old is always hitting his brother

My son’s father is not meeting up with him

Parent Question: My son’s father is not spending time with our 11-year-old son regularly. How do I explain this to my son?My ex has a history of multiple mental health issues. When we all lived together my son experienced those periods where depression caused his dad to withdraw. I tried to protect him from the … Continue reading My son’s father is not meeting up with him

My 10 year old girl says she is fat

Parent Question:My 10-year-old girl tells me she thinks she is fat. I try to reassure her and tell her she is lovely as she is, but I think she still ruminates and worries about it. One time she told me that she thinks she needs to go on a diet and I told her not … Continue reading My 10 year old girl says she is fat

How can I help my unhappy 15 year old daughter?

Parent Question: I am struggling with my 15-year-old daughter at the moment. She started dieting last autumn and coming up to Christmas she lost a lot of weight. She was extremely thin, spoke about food all the time, and we were very worried about her. She then fell off that “healthy eating wagon” and went … Continue reading How can I help my unhappy 15 year old daughter?